Notes to Myself

Notes to myself over the many years written in a very random manner to avoid giving out the pattern of how priorities change

Never take up anything that involves studying history

Walks are not romantic in the summer

Trust people, as long as they’re not pretty, rich, intelligent, smart, ambitious or read Mills and Boon

Never again ask the meaning of queef in a public place

Don’t try to see how long you can sustain the “sleeper hold”

Quit

One for the road is a bad idea when you’re driving at 5pm

Eat more

Never ignore a failing zipper, especially if it’s on the trousers you wear to school on the day you are to speak in assembly

Lose touch with certain individuals

Don’t get her to be friends with your ex when you know damn well they’ll get along

Don’t call people “cock-eyed” to their face when you’re not sure if they’re faking it

6am in December is a very bad time to prove your love for someone

Twisted ankle takes more than 3 days to heal

Don’t pull out an eye lash from someone else’s eye when you have shaky hands

People get blind very easily

Don’t assume your sneeze will bring nothing out

Old ladies don’t stop while crossing the road even if you’re riding at 60KMPH

Mongols are not retarded

Delhi Sucks!

Never let chemistry get in the way (with reference to the subject, not the expression)

If she hates everyone except you, she’s lying

If she loves you the most in the world, she’s lying

Putting a pencil between your finger and then slamming your hand down on the table really really hurts

Potassium Cyanide looks exactly like sugar

It’s not alright to make PMS jokes when it’s that time of the month for her

Some people are overtly sensitive – avoid telling them if one is for sorrow why can’t two be sorrow doubled

Don’t sip beer and answer a question at the same time – it can result in choking which in turn can result in you spraying the beer on a persons face

Babies don’t know that they can’t pee on your suit

Don’t regret but don’t forget either

Ask what you’re eating at someone else’s house

Some people eat snails

If you miss someone may be you should let them know – if you don’t you should surely let them know!

Let it go

People can sneak into your blog – be careful what you say

(And last but not the least) It’s not my problem!